Coma

(Thump....)

It is true to say in space no one can hear you scream. But when you are locked in your own mind, when your mind rebels because something so horrific has happened that you just block it out.... then no one can hear you scream because you are screaming inside your own mind....

(...Thump)

Here in my own mind I am finding a clarity that is disturbing. I know there are people above me... I can hear them... I can feel them.... I just cannot respond to them...

(Thump....)

I know who will be there.... Kim, old Kim.... no one knows the truth about her, and probably for a good reason. Monster... if only they knew the truth as I did.... She swore me to secrecy when I found out, and that memory is in here with me now, sitting in a corner holding a severed head, laughing....

(....Thump)

Ithiria will be there.... even though I have hurt her so, her love for me is eternal..... there is nothing she wouldn't do for me which makes my crimes against her so much more terrible.... I am free.... again.... but here I am prisoner and no one can save me.... Forgive me..... forgive.... She is here in my mind, a silver beacon in the distance, singing a song I cannot hear.... I wish I could.... maybe then I'd understand.....

(Thump...)

William.... my dear sweet prince.... so confused about what I did.... so hard about what had to be done.... I hurt him the most.... it is true to say I hurt the ones I love... always have done.... I am not a bad person.... but then I have to ask... am I? To hurt him so much.... when I was helping him so much....

(....Thump Thump)

Mizhara.... ever my teacher.... is it wrong to want to experience what she has to offer.... so many times I have thought what would have happened if she had stopped me.... where would I be now? Certainly not screaming Angelina's name in my skull while Kim cradles a head laughing.... we are so close as to be sisters.... Mizhara.... and I destroyed her.... watching her pull that trigger is the single most painful thought in here... and I see it ever day... I will see it every day for the rest of my life....

(Thump Thump Thump.... Thump....)

Mizhara.... Mizhara.... Mizhara.... some times I think I can hear her voice, even over my screams.... she is always in my mind.... over there, standing behind Kim, her hand holding two occular implants like worry balls.... her eye sockets bleeding as she look on with her cold stare.... sometimes she even has the gaping wound from the gun.... other times she is here dressed all in white.... singing to me with no voice.....

(Thump Thump... Thump Thump Thump.... Thu.... Thu....)

Everything is going white now....

(Thu... Thu..........)

Mother......

(Thu......)


Doctor Leannder leapt astride Carmilla, two paddles in her hand. A nurse ripped her hospital gown off and Kim shocked her, feeling the backlash against herself. The heart monitor showing a green line.....
"Higher...."
She shocked her again, her legs going numb. The heart monitor the same.... She jabbed a syringe from a nurse into the tube leading into her arm and pressed down the plunger... counted to ten.
"Full power....."
"But Doctor...."
"Do it!"
She shocked her again, a scream on her lips as she felt it more powerful.... the heart monitor beeped, the green line showing the heart beating.

(....ump.... thump)

What was that.....

(Thump....)

For a moment.... there was nothing.... and the hideous darkness behind the light...

(....Thump)

Death..... so close but you will not get me....

(Thump....)

They will stop you.... Ithiria... Mizhara... William..... they will fight for my life....

(...Thump)

Angelina....

(Thump....)

....

(....Thump)


Doctor Leannder turned to Mizhara, William and the holograph of Ithiria.
"She is okay, but she will be here for a few days more. She was lucky this time... "