Wednesday 5 May 2010

Dear William

Carmilla sat at the table in her and William's house, looking at the letter she had just written. With tears in her eyes she placed it on the table, taking her bag and walked out, the collar around her neck heavy, but not as heavy as the ache in her heart for her William.



My Darling William,
By now you will have heard that I have made my decision. I am too much of a coward to tell you to your face so I write you this letter and leave it for you to find.
I have made my decision because you forced me to. And because I was forced to by more friends than I knew I had. Every time I go somewhere, with you or with someone else, or on my own I see the looks, I hear the whispers. And it kills me. If I was stronger, maybe I would have chosen a different path, but Seraphim was the last straw.
She told me, I was too good for you. I wish I could let them know that I'll always think you were too good for me. I tried to tell them, but in the end I just ran, ran to a place of safety. And still they found me.
Ithiria tells me that she wants my happiness, and you have said the same. I wish you would both understand that I was happy with both of you, even though it's greedy. There are parts of me that she will always own, and there are parts of you that are bound to me. I hate the feeling that I have lost you, and in truth I would not have made the decision, but you forced me to and that hurts worse than the slavers lash. Because I know you won't see that by forcing me to choose one way or the other you condemn me either way. Forced into servitude as a slave, or forced into servitude as a free woman.
I told them all that I loved you, I do even if you think this band around my neck says otherwise. Because no matter what, you rescued me, and no matter how long I remain a slave to the music, I will always be free. You are in my heart and nothing will change that, my love.
With love,
Your Carmilla

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